High Value Dating During Covid, is it possible?
Is there such a thing as high value dating during Covid?
I know some espouse not dating or talking to men at all during the lockdown or until everyone is vaccinated and life returns to normal. However I find this a bit like ‘abstinence only’ advice. It’s the perfect ideal to tell teenagers not to have sex, just don’t do it! What then, if they are less than perfect and give in to temptation? Then they’ve had no education on contraception at all and can find themselves in some very troubling situations. I see the ‘just don’t date in lockdown’ as the same thing, not educating ladies on reality if they do ‘give in’.
So, let’s be honest some ladies are never going to stop dating, regardless of covid and lockdowns. I would advise you not to break any of your local laws and if meeting up with someone from another household is illegal then please don’t do it. Rather than tyranny, the reason for this rule may be that you have a nasty outbreak where you live. So be sure you know what your local laws are and stay within them.
Never agree to home dates or ‘hang out’ dates. Even if you’re experiencing gale force winds and freezing cold. I know many towns have limited options for dates in winter, however I am going to give you some alternatives which may work even if you are in icicle territory.
Go for a Walk Date
I have talked about cheap dates previously. I’ll put my stance on this outside of Covid times at the end of the post. Essentially, walk dates can compromise your safety. I would never advise going for a walk in a park or going on a hike with someone you’ve just met. You could go for a (socially distanced) group date with some of your friends, he could bring friends too but make sure YOUR friends come along. Or you could walk through your town and have takeaway coffee. These are both options that are safer. Always text a friend and tell them where you’re going.
Safety First
Going for a walk with someone you’ve just met is not safe.
You could go with friends, make sure your friends come along too (not just his)
Takeaway Coffee
Walk through town and pick up a coffee. Much safer than hiking through large parks alone. Ideally make it your town so you know exactly where you are.
Outdoor Dining
If outdoor dining is legal where you live then engineer your dates to the afternoon. Evening dining is generally too cold to be enjoyable unless you live in the Pacific Islands but the afternoon will be warmer. Don’t be a stickler about the Saturday night dinner date. It isn’t possible at the moment, getting sick from sitting about outside isn’t sexy either. Just tell your date you have a zoom call with friends on Saturday night or you have a phone call with your friend in Australia/England. Due to the time zones it has to be Saturday night. You can use me if you’d like… your friend Kate in England! (The UK is 5 hours ahead of New York and 7 hours ahead of California)
Wrap Up Warm!
If it is cold where you are but outdoor dining is legal, wrap on all the clothes you can and order hot food and hot drinks for your afternoon dates.
Some places will provide outdoor heating, but its sensible to layer up with coats, jumpers, scarves and gloves!
Curfew Dates
Some places I’ve learned have curfews where restaurants are open but they close at 8pm. For most of the working world that means no dating during the week. If a guy finishes work at 5.30pm/6pm he’s then got to go home, spruce up, chuck on a bit of aftershave and travel to your area, its most likely going to be 7pm before he can meet you. So for most of us, trying to have a relaxed date in under one hour just isn’t possible. Schedule your dates for early Saturday and Sunday evenings instead. Sitting down at 5pm for example would give you three hours.
Other Attractions
If other attractions are open where you are, then go and try them out. You can always engineer this in conversations so that the guy feels like its all his idea but really you were leading all along. If you don’t know how to do this, you need to book a consult with me! If you find this sexist and distasteful, well so does my inner feminist to be honest. However, one can’t fight biology. The truth is guys who don’t feel that they are leading quite often don’t show up for the date. I truly wish in my heart that it was different, but it isn’t. I don’t want you to be stood up and there’s a much greater chance if the guy feels he isn’t in control of the date set up. Don’t worry, you’ll always be the real boss.
Fairground Rides
If you enjoy fairgrounds they could be a (legal) way to spend time on a date.
Hang out at Home?
If you’ve ignored all the above and somehow ended up at your place (or even more dangerous, his) then don’t meet guys alone. I think in many places this would be illegal to have someone inside your home during these Covid times, but if you’re not worried about Covid, you should be worried about your personal safety. Please don’t do it, if you end up doing it, at least have a friend at your place.
I really am not recommending home dates with guys you don’t know. This really isn’t high value behaviour, the guy isn’t demonstrating any worthiness of your time to get to know you in such an intimate setting. Don’t allow desperation or fear to push you into this. I’ve given you so many alternatives above where you can still date (if its legal) without having to go to anyone’s home.
Before I sign off, I did promise you my stance on cheap dates outside of Covid lockdown times:
Cheap Dates
1. If your primary objective is love – accept all dates, cheap and expensive.
2. If your primary objective is money – decline all cheap dates
3. If your primary objective is love with financial stability –
Accept if the date request came from the internet
Decline if the date request came from real life
If you feel I can help you navigate dating in a high value way, schedule an appointment, sign up to my newsletter and check out my book, Feminine Energy 101.